Steve has been talking trash since the Paragoud basketball schedule was released back in December about how my team was going to get beat by 'the Miracle'. To let you know how worried I am about this game, I'm going to give you a walk-through of how I will be preparing for that game on Thursday. But before I do that, lets start off with a joke: there was this little boy who had been mistreated and who had a rough home life. To top it off, his parents were now getting a divorce. While the parents were at court fighting over the custody of the child, the judge asked the boy if he would like to live with his father? The boy said "no, he beats me"! The judge then asked if he would like to live with his mother? The boy said, "no, she beats me too!" The judge then said, "well if you don't want to live with your father nor your mother, who do you want to live with?" The little boy said, "I want to live with 'the Miracle' basketball team because they can't beat anybody!!!"  HAHAHA!!

Thursday, February 2nd (game-day)

12:00am - normally I would have already been sound asleep because I usually go to bed at about 11:00pm......but hey, sleep isn't that big of a deal on this night because we have a cupcake game against 'the Miracle' tomorrow. Who needs their legs? So I go ahead and stay up.

1:30am - I'm actually fixing to turn off the lights and go to sleep, but the movie "Pure Country" comes on TBS and although I hate country music, this movie always "sucks" me in. I end up staying up until 4:00am to watch this movie, and I have no idea why.

6:30am - I'm up and getting ready for work.

6:40am - I skip breakfast. Who needs energy today? I'll have my breakfast later that night on the court.

6:50am - As I grab my frozen "Stouffer's Monterey Chicken" (best frozen meal ever invented) dinner out of the freezer on my way to work, I can't help but notice my basketball schedule on the fridge. After all of our games, I mark either a "W" or an "L" on the schedule by the team we just played depending on whether we won or lost. But on this morning, I go ahead and grab the Sharpie and write a nice big "W" on the schedule 14 hours before the game even starts.

6:51am - as I get ready to get in my vehicle, I see a couple of notes on the window of my car. They don't say who they are from, but I'm pretty sure they are from Steve....anyway, the first notes says "YOUR DEAD! ITS ON! OOOHHH !!  ITS ON!" .........the second note says, "I know what you did last summer!"

9:30am - Brad, who plays on my team, calls me on my cell phone to remind me that Brian, Derek, & Scott won't be there because they are on a ski trip in Colorado. He asks me if we need to pick up some extra players to make sure we have enough. I think it over and say, "well we've got me.....and you......and, well that's two players right there. That should be enough against this team." Brad laughs, and then says "yeah, you're probably right! Heck, I may not even show up for this one!".......(we both start laughing).

11:17am - I check my blog.......Steve has posted "ITS ON ! YOUR DEAD! ITS ON!" (NOTE: Actually, he spelled most of those words incorrectly, but that is what he meant to say.)

11:56am - I go eat my frozen dinner for lunch. Mmm mmm! This stuff is off the hook! This stuff is the bomb! Outback Steakhouse, what you got on my Stouffer's Monterey Chicken dinner?!?! Huh huh?!?!  That's what I thought!

4:42pm - I'm off work, and normally I would go ahead and go home to rest since I have a game that night. But since we play 'the Miracle', I go ahead and go the gym and do a lot of heavy lifting.

5:30pm - normally about the time I would eat for an 8:30pm game. But I don't.

7:26pm - I call Dan up and we go to 'China Buffet' here in Paragould to eat. I eat like 7 full plates, plus some Ice Cream, and 13 fortune cookies. Dan thinks I'm crazy for eating all of that right before a game........I told Dan I wanted to eat a lot, so that I would get full and slow my body down. That way I know what its like to move at the pace of Worm & Steve during the game!

7:56pm - I'm getting dressed. I'm getting ready to put on my basketball shoes, when I actually consider the thought of just playing tonight in my flip-flops. I squash the idea, and settle for a pair of Doc Martins.

8:28pm - I get to the gym, and none of the Miracle players will talk to me after reading my blog. Nate threatens to give me one of those Vickie Tennison black eyes.

8:43pm - only 4 minutes into the game, Steve gets tired and says he has to come out. He claims to everyone that he has been sick all week. Baker yells from the stands, "you're lying! You're just a wuss!"............NOTE: these Miracle fans are rough!

8:46pm - Eric Timmons' wife yells for Steve to get his lazy butt back in the game. She then tells Steve, "and when you take your worthless hide back in, tell them to run 'motion'...I'm tired of seeing y'all stand around on offense!"

9:01pm - Halftime.........the score reads  SPECTRUM 26     MIRACLE  17

9:02pm - during halftime, Worm gets a phone call on his cell phone. It appears his new puppy has flooded the kitchen with pee while he was gone. Worm has to leave the game immediately.

9:14pm - its in the 2nd half..........Lonna Baker (sitting in the stands) gets frustrated with the Miracle team, and actually walks down and sits on the bench with the Spectrum team.  Similar to the crowd in Rocky IV, switching from cheering for Ivan to Rocky right in the middle of the fight.

9:16pm - I send Lonna in the game, and give her an easy assignment of guarding Steve.

9:17pm - commish Debra, says "no girls", and Lonna has to come back out.

9:22pm - Opie goes up for layup and gets hit on the hand while shooting.......however, the ref doesn't call anything. Do they ever call anything? Do their whistles work? Personally, I don't think they do.

9:23pm - while Opie is running back down the court, out of nowhere he goes Latrell Sprewell and starts choking the ref!  

9:24pm - after we pull Opie off the ref, he makes a mad dash for the stands Ron Artest style.

9:28pm - game resumes as Spectrum knocks down 6 technical foul free throws and puts it out of reach.

9:34pm - GAME OVER

9:34pm - Scoreboard reads       SPECTRUM 65         MIRACLE WHIP    50

NOTE: If we lose this game, this post will be taken down immediately. I will also withdrawal from the basketball league and quit attending Forest Home Church. I've jut put a lot of pressure on myself by making that post. But that's okay, because basketball is one of the few things in life where I don't mind the pressure. It just makes it more fun!! BRING IT!!